Friday, November 19, 2004

Countdown to Brazil

I will be hopping on a plane with Sachin in a few hours on our merry way to Rio De Janeiro. We will be staying at a nice hotel in Ipanema about 100 meters away from Posto 9, the stretch of the vast beach along the southern edge of Rio where supposedly the hottest Cariocas hang out.

We will be doing all the touristy things of course: sip caipirinha on the beach in Ipanema (taking many many pictures of hot Brazilian girls in their "dental floss" thongs, of course), check out the gigantic statue of Christ in Corcovado, enjoy the breathtaking view of the whole city from the top of Sugarloaf, watch a football game at the Maracana stadium (maybe I will even get a Pele jersey there), visit a few Samba clubs in Copacabana. There are so many things I want to do in Rio, that I don't know if even 5 days will be enough.

After Rio, we are going to check out Iguassu Falls, which is located in the southwestern part of Brazil.

My parents were ok with me going to Brazil because they didn't really know much about the place. Of course, they started getting worried after my brother-in-law told them that two of his colleagues were robbed at gunpoint in Rio in broad daylight in front of a cop. Hopefully we won't get kidnapped or mugged. The best we can do is to use common sense and not put ourselves in dangerous situations, i.e. get so wasted that we won't realize the taxi is taking us to some favela straight out of "City of God." As long as we stick to the normal touristy places, I think we will be fine, I hope. In one surreal moment last week, Mom tried to coach me on what to say if we get kidnapped by terrorists. My parents are really worried about the anti-Americanism that has only been fanned by Bush's re-election. I don't blame them.

Another problem that concerns me is the fact that neither Sachin nor I speak any Portuguese. Sachin thinks we will be able to get by fine with English and his high school Spanish. I, on the other hand, wish I know how to say the most crucial Portuguese phrases, such as "We are Canadians," "Please don't kill us, just take the money," "Keep the booze flowing," and most importantly, "Your room or mine?" I asked the Brazilian busboy at the Mexican restaurant that I went to last night how to say Long Island Iced Tea. Unfortunately, no such drink exists there. Maybe it's all for the best.

One last nagging question: to speedo or not to speedo? Tolu and BK, I will try to get you guys leopard-print thongs.