This Just In

I just overheard some woman who told the senior managing director sitting near me that Asian men have no butts. "They have hips like Asian women, " she observed, "but they don't have butts." I turned around and saw her back. She was a slender blonde who looked like she might be hot. I took a stroll to the water fountain in an unsuccessful attempt to see her face and if she's really hot. On my way there, I thought about mooning her and asking her to judge the size of my butt. Then I grabbed my ass. She's right!! I have no ass!! My cheeks are firm but pretty flat. Hmm, I wonder if I should start checking out other Asian guys to see if they are also not well-endowed "below the equator" (as Seinfeld so elegantly put it).

UPDATE: Correct that, my cheeks are NOT firm, but actually soft and supple, somewhat like those Lychee fruit jellos that had to be recalled because they caused a bunch of choking deaths for small children.